Obituary of a man named Monet --- A Brief Story!

Knock knock, knuckles on the wood of the front door, the screen shaking violently with each slam.

"Who there?" the man sitting on the couch says.


"Monet..." a whisper came out from the front door.

"This cannot be, for I am Monet!!" the man said, springing to his feet.

Another knock, louder than before, the man opened the door, dashing outside, his fist ready for a fight.

There was no one there.

He went back inside, again, the knock.

"Who is there?"

"The Devil..."

The man jumped back.

"Go away, no one here to see you!!" he replied.

A chuckle, a horrid laugh, the door flung open. 

"Monet, it is your time to die!"

The man tried to run but found himself glued to the floor.

He screamed.

Then died.

Monet, sweet Monet, passed away that day, of unknown causes, a fright?

LIVE FOR TODAY - Another letter to a friend

12-31-2018

To my dear friend,

 Live for today, dream sweetly for the future, let go of the past for you cannot change those things; forgive yourself for those actions, so you may move forward into a better life.

If I could, I would take all your pain away and throw it away into the cosmos, to replace those pains with a healing pace.

I tell you how much I love you, that I care about you, but that pain keeps the words away, the pain tells you that you are worthless but you are worth more to me than all the gold in the world.

I am here for you, if you need to reach out for something to grab, do not fall into that dark pit of despair, depression.

To go down that road of life, you need to forgive yourself for your past, which, if you do not, will drag you to the side of the road where the quicksand lie, to grab you and pull you down into the mire and darkness, to take your life away.

Sit for awhile here with me, look up into the heavens, see the beauty of it all, believe in yourself, find your self worth again.

I do not want to lose you to that darkness, I want nothing but happiness for you, in your life, to feel nothing but joy, glee.

Dream sweetly, to feel joy, as you travel down that road, just know that if you need me, I am here to try and pick you up if you fall.

Good night, sweet dreams, my Sunshine....

Sex, sex and more sex! A blog about sex? No WAY!!!!

Sex sells, everybody is either thinking about or a lucky few are doing it, or thinking about it while doing it.'

I guess I'm not thinking about it or doing it, I'm sitting here at almost 11 pm, listening to YouTube videos, some of them are about sex, which I guess could be construed as a blog about sex.

So there you go, SEX SELLS!!! Hi!!

Anyways, I just felt like writing, typing something and hitting publishing!!! Hope all of you are doing well.

A Random Trip inside my mind!

The words slipped out, onto the page, it was a cold night, dark, the wind howling.

I was some other age, young, still innocent, if there was such a thing.

What if this "Reality" wasn't real, just part of some messed up fantasy of a blind deaf girl hitting random buttons on a keyboard connected to the server controlling our "Matrix", our quote on quote reality?

What if death was just her deleting us out by accident?

These are the things that keep me awake at night.

That and 12 pots of hot, black coffee, two scoops of sugar, to destroy my blood.

The words continue to spew out, in some form of random mindless wonders, some day, I will have to make some new friends, ones who haven't heard my same jokes about 1980s sitcoms and Ronald Reagan jokes.

"Tell us about the time you killed a whole room full of Nazi vampires in 1922!!"

It was a cold dark night...

On the Road with some Random Guy

We were dancing on the freeway; cars zooming by, we dared them to hit us, full on impact but they swerved like the chicken shits they were.

We were in Ohio, outside some town, the sign read 'Hollow Oak - Home of Buzz Aldrin or Jimmy Crackcorn or something' all towns out here had to have signs telling you who famous was born there and if they didn't have any one famous from there, they had to add the last time their high school won something.

In Indiana, one town had their sign - GOPHERS WINNER OF THE NATIONAL CHOIR SOCIETY CHAMPIONSHIP 1976.

There in Hollow Oak they had a museum for their home town hero; the house he was born and raised in with a sign in the front yard that read: SO AND SO MUSEUM AND GIFT SHOP - ADMISSION $5.00 A PERSON.

Marcos gave the guy a wooden nickel and said it was worth ten bucks and we entered with glee.

"Green shag carpeting just as it was left in 1978 when so and so ran away from this one horse town!!" the tour guide said pointing down at our feet.

All I saw was a lake of blood and demon fish.  "Did he know how to swim?" I asked but the tour guide kept moving forward.

"Here in the kitchen....."

Twenty minutes later we were done; beating up the ticket guy to get our wooden nickel back.

"I didn't say it was going to be a good tour!"

In Cincinnati, home of the fighting Butt Pirates (we missed the sign) we stopped in for the Ohio State Dish - monkey brains and donkey testicles; a treat you can sink your teeth into and go, EWW!!

Marcos remembered his childhood as he ate his.  I remembered my prom date and wondered if Virgil was still alive and well.

We left a good tip; half a wooden nickel and a quart of vomit.

I had forgotten what monkey brains does to me.

We ventured on down the high way.

WORLD WAR THREE --- BY ERROR THROUGH COMPUTER TECHNOLOGY!

June 3rd, 1980 --- About 2:30 AM ---

Computers at the National Military Command Center, beneath the Pentagon, at the headquarters of the North American Air Defense Command (norad), deep within Cheyenne Mountain, Colorado, and at Site R, the Pentagon’s alternate command post center hidden inside Raven Rock Mountain, Pennsylvania, issue an urgent warning ----

THE FRUCKING SOVIET UNION HAS LAUNCHED A NUCLEAR ATTACK AGAINST THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA!!!

Those damn commies had recently invaded Afghanistan so tensions were the highest they had been since the Cuban Missile Crisis.

Ballistic Missile Crews removed "The Keys" from their safes.  

Bomber plane pilots ran to their assigned planes.

Attack planes were launched to search the skies.

It was like a movie, the FAA was ready to pull all flights from the air, to order them to land wherever they could.

Zbigniew Brzezinski, President Jimmy Carter's national-security adviser, was asleep in Washington DC, when the phone call came through.

"Them dirty commies have launched nukes at us!!!" someone screamed as he answered the phone. "Computer shows thousands on their way to kill us all in a beautiful but deadly fire balls, hotter than the mother fucking sun!!"

(Disclaimer -- Conversation recreated from a fictional account as giving by a mouse sitting in the corner on the night in question)

Brzezinski told his military aide, General William Odom, who was on the phone to get confirmation of the attack.

A retaliatory attack would need to be ordered and quickly.

Washington DC would soon be a burning ruin; a shit ball to its former shit ball status but on fire.

A real buzz kill.

Brzezinski did not wake up his wife; hoping that if the attack was true, she would die peacefully in her sleep, and also she was a real bear when awaken.

"No need to add more shit to the storm!"

As he prepared to call Carter and recommend an American counterattack, the phone rang for a third time. 

Odom apologized—it was a false alarm. 

An investigation later found that a defective computer chip in a communications device at norad headquarters had generated the erroneous warning.

The chip cost forty-six cents.

46 cents defective computer chip almost caused the end of the world.

This wasn't the first time an error had occurred.

A similar false alarm had occurred the previous year, when someone mistakenly inserted a training tape, featuring a highly realistic simulation of an all-out Soviet attack, into one of NORAD’s computers.

During the Cold War, false alarms were also triggered by the moon rising over Norway, the launch of a weather rocket from Norway, a solar storm, sunlight reflecting off high-altitude clouds, and a faulty A.T. & T. telephone switch in Black Forest, Colorado.

So basically, we've been on the "Eve of Destruction" on errors quite a few times; mostly unreported except through the fictionalization of events in movies.

Along with folks trying to flex their muscles in some leader orgasmic ritual, we are living in scary times; one false flick of a mouse or the ego of some world leader with a nuke, and goodbye Norma Jean and hello Fiery  end of the world as we know it.

So kids, if you're programming a virus to simulate a nuclear attack by a rogue nation, please don't, nations are on high tensions!!

They'll go off with one stroke!

WHO IS RUNNING FOR GOVERNOR 2018 --- THE GREAT STATE OF IDAHO!

WHO IS RUNNING FOR GOVERNOR 2018 --- THE GREAT STATE OF IDAHO!

Another night in the lovely paradise that is my mind; and decided, "Why not write another election piece; midterms baby, 2018!!"

Tonight's adventures, ventures, I don't know, brings us to the state that brings us potatoes and women in garter belts; IDAHO!!!

Oh Idaho, you wonderful state, the state whose song is OH IDAHO, THERE YOU ARE, AND HERE'S YOUR SONG!!! 

This election time (November 6th, 2018) we have running for governor of this great state, two people --- a dirty dish towel and some guy named Frank.

I kid of course, they are both dirty dish towels!

The current governor, Butch Otter, is serving three terms and has decided to say "Fuck this shit!" and wander away for some fly fishing.

There are two candidates running ----- >

Lt. Governor Brad Little, Republican

Paulette Jordon, former state representative and full time belly dancer, Democrat (We kid on the part she's a belly dancer. She does love to dance!!!)

BRAD LITTLE

REPUBLICAN

WEBSITE:http://www.bradlittleforidaho.com/

MOTTO: "We wear cowboy hats so the sun doesn't cook our brains!"

About Brad:

Brad was born Tilly Anne Stover of Walla Walla, Washington in 1872 or maybe we're confusing him with a vampire we read about.

We're not sure.

Brad fell into politics accidentally.

"I wanted to be a race car driver!" Brad told us from his secret underground lair all people in Idaho have (all 12 of them!! Don't believe me? Go Google!! I know, doesn't Idaho sound wonderful??")

Brad's father led him to find the values of his ancestors.

"Killing people is fun!! Hiding the bodies is not so much fun!!!"

After graduating college with a degree in underwater basket weaving, Brad was offered a job at the local strip club (Manny's place where the food is cold and the beer is warm and the women, well, they might have all their teeth!!!) but he decided to go back to his family's ranch where he discovered artificially inseminating bulls is a dangerous job.

"I got kicked in the face a lot!!"

Brad met his wife, whose name we don't feel like looking back up, and they were married in ceremony on the planet Venus.

"It was a beautiful ceremony!"

And soon Brad found himself wondering, "What can I do for Idaho now?"

He became a leader of the Sheep Shearers' Union and went on to do bigger and better things.

"Like sky diving!!"

To read more about Brad's life, you can go here ---- https://www.bradlittleforidaho.com/meet-brad-little/ or do like we do, and just wait for the movie starring Brad Pitt!!

WHY BRAD?

Why Brad? We say WHY NOT BRAD!?  

Brad is a ho, a true ho, he runs through the streets every night from 3 am till 9 am screaming I-DA-HO!!!!

His wife gets mad and tries to get him to come home.

"I'm cold!!' he says shivering and trying to get into bed.

Brad on the issues:

"I like cheese!" Brad says as we sit at a table at Margie's Bar and Grill in Boise.  "I think it all began when I was a child and just exploded after that!"

We kid.

Kinda.

We're not allowed into Boise but Idaho Falls likes us.

Brad is for education.

We guess.

We don't feel like clicking any more links but if you truly want to read his likes and stuff, you can go here ---- https://www.bradlittleforidaho.com/meet-brad-little/

PAULETTE JORDAN

DEMOCRAT

WEBSITE:https://www.jordanforgovernor.com/

ABOUT PAULETTE:

Paulette was born in the year of our lord of 1979, December.  She grew up on a farm in Northern Idaho, which means she was a typical kid from Idaho, growing potatoes and smothering small children during her family's yearly summer vacations to Spokane, Washington.

Paulette went to the University of Washington where she learned a love for politics, student rage against the system and her love for interpretative dance.

"I scored a 82 on the judges' cards for Dancing with the Stars!!"

She soon graduated and decided that dance could wait and went into politics right off the bat.

Or maybe she went to serve on some gaming board for the Indians. We're never sure.

Someday we hope to learn how to read.

MORE ABOUT PAULETTE CAN BE FOUND HERE --- https://www.jordanforgovernor.com/about-paulette/ 

WHY PAULETTE:

If we could vote in Idaho, we'd vote for Paulette.

Why?

Cause we could.

Probably her eyes.

Or her horse.

We like horses.

Plus we think we've falling in lust with her.

Yes Brad is cute too.

God, we're so confused!!!

MORE ON PAULETTE'S STAND ON ISSUES HERE ---- https://www.jordanforgovernor.com/priorities/

WHO WILL WIN??

The potato!!!

The potato always win!!!

Good night and have a better tomorrow!!!